You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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