So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
