I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
you made out with another girl for some wings
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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