whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
