I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
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