Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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