it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
