He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Why is your signature on my underwear?
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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