real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize