Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
you would pick up someone in the library
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
