People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
