I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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