She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
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