Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
