I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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