Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize