You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
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