It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
