you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
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