Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize