This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
