I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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