so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Alive.
So much puke
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
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