when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
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