I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
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