Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
