Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry Im_Bro_GDIs_Suck hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(919): View more from North Carolina

Yes give me all the cream and he's gone

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(727): View more from Florida

please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me

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(708): View more from Illinois

you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.

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(248): View more from Michigan

like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.

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(443): View more from Maryland

We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.

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(703): View more from Virginia

I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.

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