There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
