yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
