I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
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