Rock
Scissors
Fuck
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize
