don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
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