just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Randomize
