brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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