You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
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