Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
bring money and cleavage
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
