if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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