A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
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