I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Randomize
