is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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