What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
