You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize