You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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