Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
