Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize