fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
