she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Randomize
