i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
