Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
