two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
