Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
